Valentine's Day
Here’s Why We Really Celebrate Valentine’s Day
(It’s Probably Not What You Think!)
[Readers’ Digest]
Valentine’s Day shows up every February with hearts, flowers and a lot of opinions, but what is the meaning of Valentine’s Day, really? Is it a celebration of romance, a catchall for every kind of love or just another excuse to buy candy and cards? However you feel about it, the holiday has become so ingrained in modern culture that it’s hard not to wonder how it all started and why it still matters.
That question is exactly why looking at the history of Valentine’s Day is so fascinating. The traditions we recognize today didn’t appear overnight. They evolved over centuries through poetry, folklore, shifting social norms and even a few myths along the way. To help make sense of it all, we asked Elizabeth White Nelson, PhD, an associate professor of history at the University of Nevada, Las Vegas, to explain how this popular tradition took shape, what we often get wrong about its origins and why it continues to resonate.
From saints to sonnets to shopping carts, read on to better understand the history of Valentine’s Day and what it says about how we express love today.
WHAT IS THE HISTORY OF VALENTINE’S DAY?
The truth about Valentine’s Day is messy, older and a lot more interesting than what we’ve been taught. Here’s what to know about the figures and traditions most often linked to Valentine’s Day.
The Execution Of Saint Valentine
There were, inconveniently, several men named Valentine who became Christian saints, and none of them had much to do with romance. While popular lore often paints Saint Valentine as a secret matchmaker or martyr for love, Nelson points out that “none of them have any real ties to lovers.” What did matter was timing: Saint Valentine’s feast day landed on Feb. 14—the day Saint Valentine was executed and also a time when folk love traditions were already being celebrated.
Over time, the religious observance and the romantic customs became loosely associated, mostly because they shared a date on the calendar. But as Nelson notes, they were “only anecdotally linked.” The idea that Valentine’s Day began as a formal Christian celebration of love is more myth than fact.
The Roman Festival Lupercalia
You may have heard that Valentine’s Day grew out of an ancient Roman festival called Lupercalia, a mid-February celebration involving fertility rituals, animal sacrifice and general chaos. It’s a great story, but according to Nelson, it’s just that: a story. “This connection was a theory put forward by Francis Douce in 1807,” Nelson says. “It is only a theory—there is not factual basis for this connection.”
That doesn’t mean Valentine’s Day history is all hearts and lace. One of Nelson’s favorite lesser-known tales comes from historian Frank Staff, who wrote about French women burning men in effigy after being rejected by their assigned valentines—a practice allegedly outlawed by the French government around 1810. “I don’t know if this is true,” Nelson admits, “but I love that story!” Romantic? Not exactly. Memorable? Absolutely.
HOW DID VALENTINE’S DAY TURN INTO A ROMANTIC HOLIDAY?
Valentine’s Day didn’t suddenly flip a switch and become romantic. It eased into it through poetry and private expressions of love. During the Middle Ages, writers began linking Feb. 14 with romance, especially in courtly poetry. Nelson notes that there are “interesting examples of poems from the Medieval period that mention St. Valentine’s Day,” including works by Chaucer, though many of these were originally shared in private letters and only became widely known much later. Those poems helped cement the idea that this was a day connected to love, not because of church ritual but because people were already using it that way.
From there, the holiday became increasingly personal. Love letters, or billet doux, as they were called, gained popularity in the late 17th century, and by the late 1700s, the focus shifted from choosing a person as your valentine to giving a physical card. As Nelson explains, “the shift from the person being the valentine to a card being the valentine happens in the last quarter of the 18th century.” Handmade cards and later printed ones took off, moving the day even further away from formal observance and toward romance and emotional connection—aka the version of Valentine’s Day we recognize today.
WHAT DOES VALENTINE’S DAY MEAN TODAY?
Today, Valentine’s Day is as much about all kinds of love as it is about romantic love. For many people, it’s a chance to celebrate partners, sure, but also friends, family members or even yourself. As Nelson notes, the holiday’s meaning has evolved: The romantic traditions we now know didn’t come from any single ritual but from centuries of custom gradually centering on affection and personal connection.
Culturally, Valentine’s Day looks different around the world too. In some countries, it’s heavily romantic; in others, it’s also about friendship or community. And while it’s rooted in history, the modern holiday has become a multibillion-dollar industry. According to the National Retail Federation, U.S. consumer spending on Valentine’s Day reached a record $27.5 billion in 2025, with Americans budgeting about $188.81 per person on average. Projections for 2026 suggest retail activity will stay around $27.7 billion. Much of that goes toward jewelry, dining out, flowers, candy and greeting cards, a reminder that while Valentine’s Day is about love, it’s also a major moment for commerce.
WHAT ARE THE ORIGINS OF THE MOST POPULAR VALENTINE’S DAY TRADITIONS?
Valentine’s Day is filled with fun customs, from decorating with paper hearts to giving gifts. But many of the things we now associate with the holiday have fascinating histories that go back decades—or even centuries.
Giving Valentines
The tradition of sending valentines originates with St. Valentine himself, who, according to legend, sent a farewell letter to his jailer’s daughter signed “from your Valentine.” Centuries later, the Victorians turned this phrase into a holiday ritual, creating elaborate cards to declare affection. According to Nelson, British writer Samuel Pepys suggests in his diary “that people had more than one valentine and that married people had valentines who were not their spouses.” Hallmark cemented the practice in 1913 by mass-producing valentines, turning the gesture into the widespread, heart-filled tradition we continue today.
Eating Candy Conversation Hearts
Those little pastel hearts with cheeky sayings? They date back to the late 1800s, when a Boston pharmacist created Necco wafers as medicinal lozenges. His brother came up with the idea to print messages on them for holidays, but the “love notes” really stole the show. One of the first Valentine’s messages read, “How long shall I have to wait? Please be considerate.” By the 1910s, candy hearts were a staple of the holiday, and Brach’s eventually shaped them into today’s heart-shaped treats with sweet (and sometimes silly) sayings.
Sending Bouquets of Roses
Roses have symbolized love for millennia. Red roses, in particular, trace back to Roman mythology: The red rose, representing the blood of Adonis, was sacred to Venus, the goddess of love. White roses symbolized purity, and pink roses blended the two meanings. Over time, giving roses on Valentine’s Day became the standard way to express romantic feelings, rooted in color symbolism and mythological tradition.
Giving Heart-Shaped Boxes of Chocolates
Chocolate has long been associated with love and desire, dating back to ancient cultures like the Aztecs, who considered it an aphrodisiac. In the early 1900s, Cadbury commercialized the romance by creating heart-shaped boxes of chocolates and turning it into an iconic Valentine’s Day gift. What started as a rare and indulgent treat became a universally recognized symbol of affection.
Decorating With Hearts
The heart symbol has represented love and emotion for centuries, though it looks very different from the anatomical heart. Aristotle’s description of the human heart as having three cavities with a rounded top and pointed bottom may have inspired the now-familiar Valentine’s Day heart shape. Over time, the simple, symmetrical heart became a versatile icon for art, decoration and messaging, leading to the paper hearts, stickers and decor we plaster on everything each February. Bonus: They’re easy to draw and make a nice vehicle for cute
Valentine’s Day puns!
